Tonight You Are Nothing

Just to say tonight … I know everybody wants you, but I don’t want you at all … and I don’t need you at all.

We always want what you can’t have, and all communication is quite useless. And we delude ourselves into believe things that are not true, and we are all we need really.

I hurt now for wanting what I know I can’t have, but I can see a time in the future when this is going to mean almost nothing, because more important things are coming. And indeed … will I not always be wanting?

My memories are full of holes and shadows, and useless emotions, and things that may or may not have happened. The tree falling in the forest, and you are not there to hear it.

I pray for your happiness, I pray you get exactly what you want, and just what you deserve …

But if I knew how to not care about you at all I would do that … because I am certain you don’t deserve my time or kindness. I am only useful, if I am indeed useful … baring that I am nothing. Am I nothing?

Tonight you are nothing.

And tomorrow … I will forget my care.

~ by K.I. on July 4, 2009.